Archives for: 2013

Forgiveness

09/26/13 | by Shareen [mail] | Categories: downtown girls

Were we not friends?
Did we not laugh
And whisper
Secrets?
Were we not friends?

I remember
When we met.
You were angry
And I understood.
I welcomed you to my
Life
Because I wanted to dress you
With warmth.
Your name was Joy
But then, you had none.

Were we not friends?
You cried and told me
You loved me
And wished we
Could share Paris.

We raised
Baby kittens.
Mine was Henry
And yours Obediah.
We held them in our pockets

And I remember
how you cried when he died.
I was sorry it was not
Henry
Because I loved you
That much
And wanted your kitten
To live
For you.

Were we not friends?
Were we really not?

We had no courage
And this is what it takes
To stay
And fight
And be mean
And be silent
But still in love
And friendship.

We were friends.
We were.
And still
I know you.

A life must not be filled with
Ghosts.
We must work to keep
The love in bodies here
As long as it is.
The time for
Missing is
Not yet.

To An Ex

08/23/13 | by Shareen [mail] | Categories: downtown girls

How.
How we loved as we did
How we wrote to one another.
The passion and poetry and
effort and yearning and …
how.
how
could you be here
three blocks away
and not appear?

I hate you.
For ever
I hate you.
If I see you in a next life
I will look away
that time.
I will not reach for your
face
and kiss you and make love
to your eyes
and I will not remember you.

You broke my heart
and you have made love
nothing.
nothing

Why you will not grow.
Why you will not succeed.
Because you are unwilling
to suffer.
You will not go through.
To the other side.
Young
Young man.

You run away
and never know
the truth.
Writer.
Really?

And even that I am bothering
now
tear spilled
tear wet
face
that I am bothering
is to love you.

Clarity

08/18/13 | by Shareen [mail] | Categories: downtown girls

There is good and there is bad.
Don’t kid yourself.
There is good.
And there is bad.
You have a choice every second
who to hang with.

Give the good a name.
Give the bad a name.
For the good pick the name of someone
you love, and for the bad, pick a name of
one you hate with your whole heart.
Think about it a minute. It will help you.

When you are enjoying your life, feeling hopeful.
expectant, supported, enthusiastic,
inspired, full hearted, pretty, open, loved
and loving, you are hanging out with
your bestie. You are with your friend.
You are with the one you love.
You are in her arms, under her gaze and standing
beside her/him.
OK?

And when you feel hopeless, and scared, and
limited, and ugly, and shut down and lost and
poor, and as if everything is against you, you
are under attack by that b*tch you hate.
That’s it.
And in that moment you get to decide if you are going
to let her get you.
Are you going to let her run your life and take you down
or are you going to realize that it is up to you
to turn back and get to the one you love and who loves you?
And if you don’t know who she/he is
I’ll help you with that.
Its not tough.


The one who hates you says No. Don’t. You can’t,
You won’t. Forget it. You are nothing, worthless.
Why bother? You are ugly, you are fat, you look
terrible……..
Oh boy.
I mean, really!?
She makes you feel miserable.
Why do you talk to her/him.
Why do you live with her? Him.
Why would you listen to that?

The one who hates you lies.
She lies about you.
She does not want you to feel good.
Even writing about her brings me down.
Let us not give her any attention.
No.

The one who loves you puts her hand to your
back and says, Yes. Go. Do. Be.
You are amazing!
She makes you feel fabulous.
She makes you laugh.
She makes you feel like you are beautiful and that you
can do anything. And when you leave her you want to
skip down the path and reach for the stars and she
tells you…..you will.
You will.
You will reach the stars with your beauty and talent,
your goodness, your willingness and your humility.
You will reach the stars with your love.
You are worthy and lovable and you deserve
It all.
She makes it safe to be happy.
She makes it safe to feel good.
She loves you and believes in you and
reminds you that who you are is perfection.
She reminds you that who you are is one of a kind,
unique in all the world and as such you have a
perfectly planned future and all the gifts you
Need to arrive into it.
And she tells you also that you have not done
anything wrong, and even if you have, she tells you
that she still loves you anyway because she knows
that you are human and this makes her love you
even more.

Gosh. It’s a no brainer.
Right?
I mean, it doesn’t take a genius to decide
who to hang out with today. Does it?

Now, the more time you spend with the good friend,
the better you feel about your life and your self,
the more jealous the bad friend becomes.
Pay attention.
Right then, when you are hippity skippity, she
will try to trip you up. She will try to hurt you
even more.
Don’t let her. Don’t give in to her.
Look her in the face and say.
“Back off B*tch” Back off. I am not
with you.
Laugh.
She really hates that.
Laugh at her.
Laugh at her and her little feeble attempts to
try and get you.
And even more so, let her efforts to bring
you down support you in your knowledge that
you are truly on your way to being your best
self and to doing great good things.

YES.

Shareen

Joy

08/07/13 | by Shareen [mail] | Categories: downtown girls

THE LETTER

Today is my birthday.
That I am sharing that with
you all is a wonder.
I have not wanted to celebrate my
birthday since before college.
This had nothing to do with age,
and much instead to do with
the discomfort of being celebrated.
Imagine that coming from a former
actress.
Well, this year has been rather challenging
and deeply triumphant.
Today I not only celebrate myself, but
I welcome any well wishes anyone
wants to send my way.
I am so happy to be here, and I am
so grateful to be alive and learning,
prospering and celebrating.

On a personal level, I am single for
the first time since 2002.
And finally, that feels so good.
I realize how very afraid I have been
of being alone.
I reached for men
to fill a need to feel loved,
and they served only to distract me
from really loving myself.
The time lost was expensive.
I see now that we must not shop
for love when we are hungry.
We must feed ourselves all the love
we need so that we may pick
those that are our equals in love
and truth.

Professionally, I am
steering this company toward solid
and authentic growth.
It is tricky to grow slowly and steadily
funded only from within.
It would be easier to puff us up, but I am
committed to an ego-less expansion.
Time will honestly grow this company
through the continued interest and pleasure
of you, my clients.

Last night I went for a long walk after dark.
I felt a sense of joy surging through me as
I listened to music while climbing up hills and
steps.
When I couldn’t contain myself, I danced.
It feels amazing to be single and free,
safe and alive.
The return of joy to my heart, un-related to the
love of another, nor as a function of circumstance
is an unparalleled feeling and a great
gift to receive at this time.
I know to thank God. And trust me, I do.
I know too that God is made manifest
to me through the love of friends, and
family and all of you beauty girls who
have welcomed, honored and celebrated
me all the while.
I am grateful to be in
so thorough an embrace of all your
love today.

Thank you.

Creativity

07/13/13 | by Shareen [mail] | Categories: downtown girls

The rain is quiet
and makes the morning soft.
I tip-toed out
and into the garden.
The wet was good on
my soles.

In the small concrete of my
sweet backyard
an apple tree lives
and today I see it is bent over
with the weight of its fruit.
Gorgeous little apples,
green and pink
and then the red ones
ready for picking.
I am impressed with it.

And on my fence
I looked to see grape leaves,
wet and slick.
Were they there last year?

And like a great surprise,
better than a birthday,
hiding under big leaves
I saw a bundle of jewels
in bright green, perfect and healthy
and the artwork of a genius.
My vine has made grapes.
Gorgeous fat bundles of them.
This has made me happy.

I am touched by the modesty
of a small little apple tree
in an uncelebrated back yard
bent over with abundance and
humbled by its creativity.

And I am moved by a vine
reaching and wrapping
around a fence
that runs along a path rarely walked
and how private it is
in its delivery of perfection.

Love

05/09/13 | by Shareen [mail] | Categories: downtown girls

Second First Date

Santa Monica.
Sitting on a swing
The sun sets

A spiral staircase
Delivered me
Here

Prom girls
Barefoot
Run to the sea.

Big boys
Ride bikes
Proud palms
Protect
And the sea’s frothy
Fingers play the shore.

I have decided to start
dating myself again.
We broke up a few times
over the years and
I have been fighting to
rebuild trust.
I think, finally, I am
going to give myself another
chance.

I haven’t always been good
to myself and I haven’t listened
well.

I have not cared to meet my
own needs, and God knows
I have betrayed myself countless times.

I have put myself in danger, emotionally and
physically.
I have put myself in the wrong hands
and I have wasted many of my gifts.
But I love myself after all and have
worked hard to win myself back.

So.

I am going to date myself.
This time I am going to get it right
for this girl.
Putting me first.
Giving me everything I want.
And meeting all of my needs.
And this time, in every
thing and every way and
everyone….
Nothin but the best

I don’t think it will be a long
courtship.
I think a full commitment is
on the horizon.
I’ll keep you posted.

JOY

04/19/13 | by Shareen [mail] | Categories: downtown girls

In times like these,
Your heart may feel heavy.
It is impossible for, the open
Hearted not to feel the shift in
Energy that has occurred.

In times like these,
Pray actively.
Prayer is not just thought
It is spirit sent and actions taken.
If we pray for those in pain,
For those suffering, for those
In shock, and yet do nothing to
Relieve pain, to comfort and to enliven,
Then we have not contacted God.

In times like these,
Reach out.
Make that call you have put off.
Pay that visit.
Turn your regrets into gladness.

In times like these,
Be kind to yourself.
In all things choose the action
That will make you feel free,
delighted, and at ease.
Practice compassion and acceptance
On yourself.

In times like these
Make the most of what you have.
We have all been given so much
And waste our time asking for more.
It is a form of creative laziness and
comes from a need for distraction.
Stop.
Look into your heart.
What you want is already given.

In times like these,
Express gratitude fiercely.
For those who have been maimed
Run, dance, jump, touch, create.
For those already returned to
Spirit join them
In peace.
For those who are suffering,
Find joy and celebrate

The only antidote to fear
Is love
The only antidote to evil
Is joy.
The robber may take from the
Body and he surely lives in the
Mind, but the heart, the spirit
Is ours and this we must guard, and
Never surrender.

The war on terror is fought
Within us each every moment.
There is only love and fear.
One is real and the other a phantom
Meant to inhibit you.
Intended to limit you.
Know where your fears live,
And turn away from them with your love,
Laughter and gratitude.

FREEDOM

03/13/13 | by Shareen [mail] | Categories: downtown girls

Malibu eucalyptus.
Paradise Cove.
Below seaside,
a girl dances.

Sea spray
at her toes.
Starlings run.
Her fingers play
sunshine’s final hour.

Her spirit,
the moonrise.
Her gaze,
the horizon.
Her heart cries
the glee of gulls.

Authentic
and free,
she is the center
of you and me.

Music,
her invitation.
Ease and solitude,
her safety.
Give her time
and let
a romance
begin.

LOVE

01/25/13 | by Shareen [mail] | Categories: downtown girls

It’s the well said hello
The smile to the stranger
The compliment honestly
Given
Bits of love shimmering
And true
Make music
And in the heart too,
Song

It’s the healthy choice
The no means no
The put yourself first.
These bits of love,
Golden and bright
That strengthen the step
To walking, to striding,
To run and dance

It’s the offer to help.
The appointment kept.
The word followed through.
bits of love
Solid and rich,
Make wealthy
Our most impoverished
Heart

And it is work
The good life.
And joy is sometimes
Hard won.
But bit by bit
With our hands
In our hearts,
We craft it,
That house
Of sweetness
We dream of.